Family

Suggested Topics:

  • U.S. culture is often viewed as being driven by the individual, rather than family-driven. It is common for Americans to move far away from their families to follow a career opportunity. How is individualism viewed in your country?
  • Asking “are you married?” is usually not one of the first questions we ask in a conversation with a new person. Is marriage an acceptable topic of conversation in your culture? Why or why not? In what contexts is it appropriate to talk about?
  • Immediate versus extended family: Do you come from a big family or a small family? What are family gatherings like?

 

Activity: Read the words below and discuss what each one means with a Conversation Partner.

  • Bridezilla
  • Middle child syndrome
  • Soccer mom
  • Empty nest syndrome
  • Military/army brat (sometimes offensive)

 

Additional Resources:

Family Structure

  • Who makes the major decisions in your family?
  • Do you like spending time with your family? How do you typically spend time together?
  • Do you feel that you have any choice of career, or do your parents have certain expectations of what you will study and do in life?
  • Are single mothers or fathers common in your country? Why or why not?

Marriage

  • When people in your culture get married, are they expected to live in a new home? Do they live with other family members?
  • Is divorce or separation common in your culture, or is it taboo?

Family Names

  • In your culture, do women keep their last name when they get married? Do men? Are family names combined?
  • Is your family name common? Does it have any special significance?

 

Vocabulary List: Family

Word Meaning Context
General Questions    
Immediate family Your close family (also called a nuclear family).  Your immediate family is directly related to you. This includes your:

v  Parents

v  Grandparents

v  Siblings (brothers and sisters)
Extended family Your entire family This includes your:

v  Cousins

v  Aunts and uncles

v  In-laws
Patrilineal/patriarchal The family name or ancestry runs through the father U.S. society is often patriarchal.
Matrilineal/matriarchal The family name or ancestry runs through the mother  
Only child A child who has no brothers and sisters. “I’m an only child.”

This is fairly common in U.S. culture.
Adopted When someone completes a legal process to become a child’s parent or guardian.  Usually, the child is not biologically related to the parent. “I’m adopted.  My biological mother/father is from ____.”
Family Structure    
Nuclear Family When a mother, father, and children live together. Most American families live under this structure, although grandparents may also live with a nuclear family.
Foster Family When a child’s parents cannot care for him or her, the child is placed into foster care.  A foster family is usually arranged by the state or social services.  Foster families are paid to take care of the children. Some children might live in multiple foster homes throughout their childhood.
Step-family: step-father, step-son, step-daughter, etc. Examples:  A step mother is the new spouse of your father

A step-son is your new spouse’s son, but not yours

  
Half-brother; half-sister A brother or sister with whom you share one but not both parents  
Marriage    
Elope (Noun:  elopement) To get married without telling your family or friends.  The verb literally means “to run away.” Some couples in the U.S. elope, but many families expect a couple to have an official ceremony.
Arranged marriage A marriage planned by other family members.  A family member plans who his or her child will marry Arranged marriages are not common in American families, unless they are first generation Americans.  Most Americans highly value being able to choose a partner themselves.
Domestic partnership When a couple lives together for an extended period of time. After ten years, it is called a “civil union,” and has legal status.  The laws are different in every state for civil unions. Many same-sex couples live as domestic partners or in civil unions, but this is changing now with new marriage laws.
Family Names    
Maiden Name Your original family name before getting married (usually applies to  women) Her married name is Anderson, but her maiden name is Schwartz.
Hyphenated Names Some couples combine or hyphenate their name.  Instead of changing her name, a woman may choose to keep her maiden name, or use both her maiden name and married name. Examples:

Lisa Simmons Brown

James Levy-Cohen

 
Expressions    
Like father, like son

Like mother, like daughter

 This expression refers to when a child is very similar in behavior or personality to one of his or her parents.  
Family-driven Someone who prioritizes family above all else  
Career-driven Someone who prioritizes career above all else  
Family-friendly The event, movie, etc.  is appropriate for families with children.